7 Essential Biblical Principles for a Strong and Lasting Christian Marriage

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Marriage is one of the most important decisions we make in our lives. It is a beautiful union of two people, who are willing to share their lives and walk together, united in love and commitment. However, marriage is not always easy. It requires hard work, dedication, and sacrifice. In this devotional post, we will explore God’s blueprint for marriage and how it can help us build a strong foundation for our relationships.

God’s Blueprint for Marriage

God has a plan for every aspect of our lives, including marriage.

Genesis 2:18, God said, “It is not good for the man to be alone. I will make a companion for him who corresponds to him.”

From the very beginning, God intended for man and woman to come together in marriage and form a lifelong partnership. This partnership is not just a physical union, but a spiritual and emotional one as well.

1. The Importance of Communication

Communication is the cornerstone of a healthy marriage. Without communication, misunderstandings, conflicts, and resentment can build up and lead to a breakdown in the relationship.

Ephesians 4:29 says, “Do not let any unwholesome talk come out of your mouths, but only what is helpful for building others up according to their needs, that it may benefit those who listen.”

Communication should be kind, constructive, and respectful. We should learn to listen to our spouse’s concerns and be open to feedback.

Suppose a husband and wife have different expectations about how they will spend their weekends. The husband enjoys spending time at home, while the wife likes to go out and socialize with friends. Instead of communicating their desires and expectations, they both assume that the other person feels the same way.

As a result, the husband feels frustrated when the wife makes plans with friends on a Saturday night, and the wife feels hurt when the husband declines invitations to social events. If they don’t address this issue through clear and honest communication, it could lead to resentment and distance in their relationship.

By discussing their feelings and needs openly and honestly, the couple can work together to find a compromise that honours both of their desires. They may need to practice active listening, share their thoughts and feelings without judgment, and seek to understand each other’s perspectives.

By making communication a priority in their marriage, the couple can deepen their connection, strengthen their emotional bond, and build a foundation of trust that will support them through all of life’s ups and downs.

Proverbs 18:13 (NET) says, “The one who gives an answer before he listens – that is his folly and his shame.”

2. The Role of Selflessness

Marriage requires a great deal of selflessness.

Philippians 2:3-4 says, “Instead of being motivated by selfish ambition or vanity, each of you should, in humility, be moved to treat one another as more important than yourself. Each of you should be concerned not only about your own interests, but about the interests of others as well.”

Suppose a husband has had a long day at work and is feeling exhausted. His wife notices that he’s tired and offers to cook dinner for him, even though she’s also had a busy day. By putting her husband’s needs ahead of her own, she’s demonstrating selflessness and a willingness to serve him.

Similarly, if the wife has been struggling with a personal issue, the husband may choose to set aside his own desires and spend time listening to her, offering words of encouragement and support.

By practising selflessness, each partner is showing love and respect for the other, which can strengthen their relationship and deepen their connection.

Philippians 2:3-4 (NET) says, “Instead of being motivated by selfish ambition or vanity, each of you should, in humility, be moved to treat one another as more important than yourself. Each of you should be concerned not only about your own interests, but about the interests of others as well.”

We should be willing to put our spouse’s needs above our own and be willing to make sacrifices for their well-being.

3. The Gift of Forgiveness

Forgiveness is essential for a healthy marriage.

Colossians 3:13 says, “Bear with each other and forgive one another if any of you has a grievance against someone. Forgive as the Lord forgave you.”

Suppose a husband and wife have an argument that turns into a hurtful exchange of words. Both parties feel hurt, angry, and resentful. Instead of holding onto their anger and refusing to forgive each other, they both decide to humble themselves and seek forgiveness.

Through the act of forgiving and asking for forgiveness, they both demonstrate a willingness to let go of their anger and work towards rebuilding their relationship. They may need to have a heart-to-heart conversation, acknowledge their mistakes, and work together to find a resolution that honours both their needs and desires.

By practising forgiveness, the couple can heal their relationship and prevent resentment and bitterness from taking root.

Ephesians 4:32 (NET) says, “But instead, be kind to one another, compassionate, forgiving one another, just as God in Christ also forgave you.”

Forgiveness requires humility and a willingness to let go of hurt and anger. We should learn to extend grace to our spouse, just as Christ has extended grace to us.

4. Intimacy in Marriage

Intimacy is an important aspect of marriage, both physically and emotionally.

1 Corinthians 7:3-4 says, “The husband should fulfil his marital duty to his wife, and likewise the wife to her husband. The wife does not have authority over her own body but yields it to her husband. In the same way, the husband does not have authority over his own body but yields it to his wife.”

Suppose a couple has been married for several years and is starting to feel a sense of disconnection in their relationship. They may have become comfortable with their routines and have lost the sense of excitement and passion that they had at the beginning of their marriage.

To rekindle their intimacy, the couple could set aside time to be alone together, without distractions from work or other responsibilities. They could communicate openly and honestly about their desires and needs. They could also work on building emotional intimacy by sharing their thoughts and feelings with each other, listening attentively, and showing affection through small acts of kindness.

By prioritizing their intimacy, the couple can rediscover the joy and connection they once had, and build an even stronger foundation for their marriage.

Song of Solomon 4:9 (NET) says, “You have stolen my heart, my sister, my bride! You have stolen my heart with one glance of your eyes.”

We should learn to cultivate intimacy in our marriage, both through physical affection and emotional connection.

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5. Keeping God at the Center

Ultimately, the most important aspect of a strong marriage is keeping God at the centre.

Matthew 19:6 says, “So they are no longer two, but one flesh. Therefore what God has joined together, let no one separate.”

Suppose a couple is faced with a difficult decision that could impact their future. They could choose to make the decision on their own, relying solely on their own understanding and reasoning. Or they could choose to pray together, seek God’s guidance, and make the decision together with God’s help.

By choosing to keep God at the centre of their decision-making process, the couple is acknowledging that they are not in control and that they need God’s help to make the right choice. This act of surrender and trust strengthens their faith and their relationship with each other and with God.

Proverbs 3:5-6 (NET) says, “Trust in the LORD with all your heart, and do not rely on your own understanding. Acknowledge him in all your ways, and he will make your paths straight.”

When we invite God into our marriage, we invite His wisdom, guidance, and grace. We should pray together, study God’s word, and seek His will for our lives and our marriage.

6. Trust in God’s Plan for Your Marriage

Trusting in God’s plan for your marriage means that you believe that God has a purpose for your union and that he is always working for your good. Trusting in God’s plan means that you are committed to putting your faith in Him, even during difficult times in your marriage.

Psalm 37:5 (NET) – “Commit your future to the LORD! Trust in him, and he will act on your behalf.”

Psalm 138:8 (NET) – “The LORD will fulfill his promise for me. O LORD, your loyal love endures. Do not abandon the work of your hands.”

For example, let’s say that a couple is going through a financial hardship that is causing stress in their marriage. Trusting in God’s plan means that they believe that God is in control and that he will help them overcome this difficulty at the right time and in the right way. This trust in God’s plan can help them stay committed to each other and work together to solve their problems.

7. Honouring and Respecting Your Spouse

Honouring and respecting your spouse means that you value your partner as an equal and treat them with kindness and consideration. It means that you are committed to understanding their needs and feelings and doing your best to meet them.

Colossians 3:19 (NET) – “Husbands, love your wives and do not be embittered against them.”

Philippians 2:3 (NET) – “Instead of being motivated by selfish ambition or vanity, each of you should, in humility, be moved to treat one another as more important than yourself.”

For example, let’s say that a husband and wife have different opinions about how to discipline their children. Honouring and respecting each other means that they are willing to listen to each other’s opinions, even if they don’t agree. It means that they are committed to finding a solution that works for both of them and that they won’t dismiss or belittle each other’s ideas. Honouring and respecting your spouse can help build trust and strengthen the emotional bond in your marriage.

Here are the additional Bible verses:

Malachi 2:16 (NET) – ” ‘I hate divorce,’ says the Lord God of Israel.”

This verse reminds us that divorce is not God’s intention for marriage and that we should strive to work through challenges and difficulties in our relationships rather than give up on them.

1 Peter 3:7 (NET) – “Husbands, in the same way, treat your wives with consideration as the weaker partners and show them honor as fellow heirs of the grace of life. In this way nothing will hinder your prayers.”

This verse encourages husbands to treat their wives with respect and honour, recognizing their equal worth as fellow heirs in Christ.

Matthew 19:6 (NET) – “So they are no longer two, but one flesh. Therefore, what God has joined together, let no one separate.”

This verse emphasizes the sanctity and permanence of marriage and reminds us that the commitment we make to our spouse is a lifelong one.

Proverbs 31:10-12 (NET) – “Who can find a wife of noble character? For her value is far more than rubies. The heart of her husband trusts in her, and he has no lack of gain. She brings him good and not evil all the days of her life.”

This passage describes the qualities of a virtuous wife and emphasizes the importance of trust, faithfulness, and mutual benefit in marriage.

Ecclesiastes 4:9-12 (NET) – “Two people are better than one because they can reap more benefit from their labour. For if they fall, one will help his companion up, but pity the person who falls down and has no one to help him up. Furthermore, if two lie down together, they can keep each other warm, but how can one person keep warm by himself? Although an assailant may overpower one person, two can withstand him. Moreover, a three-stranded cord is not quickly broken.”

This passage highlights the strength and support that can come from a committed partnership and reminds us that we are not meant to face life’s challenges alone.

Colossians 3:18-19 (NET) – “Wives, submit to your husbands, as is fitting in the Lord. Husbands, love your wives and do not be embittered against them.”

This passage speaks to the complementary roles that husbands and wives can play in marriage and emphasizes the importance of mutual respect and love in those roles.

1 Corinthians 7:3-5 (NET) – “The husband should fulfil his marital duty to his wife, and likewise the wife to her husband. The wife does not have authority over her own body, but the husband does. And likewise, the husband does not have authority over his own body, but the wife does. Do not deprive each other, except by mutual agreement for a specified time, so that you may devote yourselves to prayer. Then resume your relationship, so that Satan may not tempt you because of your lack of self-control.”

This passage speaks to the importance of physical intimacy in a marriage and reminds us that it should be a priority in our relationships.

Conclusion

Marriage is a beautiful gift from God, but it requires hard work, sacrifice, and dedication. By following God’s blueprint for marriage, we can build a strong foundation for our relationship and create a lifelong partnership filled with love, respect, and grace. Let us strive to communicate with kindness, practice selflessness, forgive one another, cultivate intimacy, and keep God at the centre of our marriage. By doing so, we can create a marriage that honours God and reflects His love for us.

As we journey through our marriages, let us keep in mind that building a strong foundation is a process that requires continuous effort and dedication. It is not a one-time event but rather a lifelong journey. When we encounter challenges, we can always turn to God for guidance, strength, and wisdom. With God’s help, we can build a marriage that stands the test of time and honours Him in every aspect.

Let us strive to make our marriages a testimony to the love and grace of God. May our relationships be a reflection of His goodness and faithfulness. Let us love, honour, and cherish our spouses, just as Christ loves and cherishes His bride, the Church. May our marriages be a shining example of the beauty and power of God’s design.

So, let us commit to building a strong foundation for our marriages, by following God’s blueprint for marriage. Let us communicate with kindness, practice selflessness, forgive one another, cultivate intimacy, and keep God at the centre of our relationship. With God’s help, we can create a lifelong partnership filled with love, respect, and grace.

Let us pray:

Dear Lord, we thank you for the gift of marriage. Help us to build a strong foundation for our relationship by following your blueprint for marriage. May we communicate with kindness, practice selflessness, forgive one another, cultivate intimacy, and keep you at the centre of our marriage. May our relationship be a reflection of your love and grace. In Jesus’ name, we pray, Amen.

Blessings,

Godwin.


References

“NET Bible® copyright ©1996-2019 by Biblical Studies Press, L.L.C. http://netbible.com All rights reserved.

 

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Godwin Shon Sequeira
Godwin Shon Sequeira
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2 Comments

  1. […] Marriage is a sacred union between two people who have committed themselves to each other in love and faithfulness. As a Christian wife, you have the opportunity to live selflessly with your husband, following the example of Jesus Christ, who demonstrated the ultimate act of selfless love by sacrificing his life for us. In this article, we’ll explore seven biblical principles and Christian wisdom on how to live selflessly with your husband. […]

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Blessings to you.